Spoil a wish

[Jubal]

You remember to make a wish, but then can't think of a wish to make. It drives you mad.

I wish I was better at getting up early.

[Cuddly Khan]

From now on you get up at 2AM every single day for the rest of your life, no matter the time you go to sleep.

I wish for insanity.

[Jubal]

sefdnksivajlemospDF??@@@*(&%^%$ npoijbo FIUAS

I wish I didn't have muscle tension problems.

[Caradìlis]

The muscle tension is gone, but so is all other sensation in your muscles...

I wish I didn't need food to survive...

[Glaurung]

You can photosynthesise - but you're bright green, you can't move much, and you would kill for a piece of chocolate.

I wish I could think of something when someone says "what do you wish for?".

[Caradìlis]

You can always think of a hundred things to wish for, but you are never content with anything anymore...

I wish I didn't have to get out of bed in the morning...

[Jubal]

You never have to get out of bed in the morning. This is because earth has been renamed "bed".

I wish I could teleport.

[Caradìlis]

You can teleport to anywhere you like, but everytime you do, your atoms are reassembled at random...

I wish we could have eternal spring

[Jubal]

Spring happens eternally, everything starts trying to grow forever, the biomass chokes the earth and eutrophicates all the water systems and everything dies in brown rotting sludge.

I wish I could do more things at once.

[Caradìlis]

You can do everything at once, but you don't remember doing any of it, jumble activities and wake up realizing you might have committed a bunch on les including - possibly - murder...

I wish I had better fine motor skills...

[Jubal]

You gain damn fine skills with a motor car. Your fine motor skills lead you to become a world famous formula one driver, the pressure gets too much for you, and you turn to alcoholism.

I wish I was better at motivating myself...

[Caradìlis]

You become the best self-motivator in the galaxy, but this ends up leading to exceptional levels of over-confidence and resulyts in your premature death after only a few weeks, because you motivated yourself into trying to fly...

I wish I could apparate...

[Jubal]

Spliced.

I wish I could calm down my muscle twitches at will :/

[Caradìlis]

No more muscle twitches, but you lose the ability to move your muscles at will aswell...

I wish I had more time to do things...

[Jubal]

You have all the time in the universe. This unfortunately means you are condemned to immortality and must watch the slow passing of the years as everything you know will change and wither.

I wish my insides felt less like jelly.