Exilian
Off-topic and Chatter: The Jolly Boar Inn => General Chatter - The Boozer => Forum Games - The Beer Cellar! => Topic started by: Jubal on August 15, 2010, 12:14:51 PM
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This is quite a simple game; all you have to do is take the previous statement and think of something that could, reasonably and logically, occur because of it.
So say I start with;
What if money did not exist?
Post 2;
If money did not exist chocolate coins would not exist either.
Post 3;
If chocolate coins did not exist children would be less happy at Christmas.
Post 4;
If children were less happy at Christmas...
You get the idea.
OKAY, to start then...
What if I (Jubal) ruled the world?
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if Jubal ruled the world, we wouldn't have wars (:P I hope :P)
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If we didn't have wars there would be more money to spend on science.
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Science would propel us to the cosmos, where star wars would erupt.
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If Star Wars erupted, I would go kick ass with a lightsaber and a small army of home-made droids.
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if you would kick ass with a lightsaber, I have failed in life (:P)
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If Hopit failed in life, he might commit suicide.
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If Hopit commited suicide, the world in general would not notice.
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If the world did not notice Hopit committing suicide, estimates of nutrient levels in the soil may prove to be too low due to not factoring in his corpse.
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If estimates of nutrient levels in the soil may prove to be too low due to not factoring in his corpse, the nutritional value of vegtables and fruit will go down.
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If the nutritional value of vegetable and fruits will go down, that means that the children will be happier, as they will not have to eat broccoli
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If children do not eat broccoli then the broccoli loses its natural predator. Broccoli shall take over the Earth!!!
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If Broccoli took over the Earth I would eat it all. YUMMY!!!
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If Khan ate all the Broccoli in the world he would get very sick.
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If I got very sick I would spew all over Phoenix.
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Makorgis would then die.
:P jks.
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And than I come back as a zombie and bite the Phoenix.
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I would then become a zombie and proceed to rule the world as a zombie that rejuvenated in flames whenever I was re-killed. But that wouldn't matter too much because I would oinly be ruling over a bit of broccoli and a sick zombie Makorgis. :D
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No just Korgis cus I ate the Broccoli. I realize that I should be the leader cus I'm the one that turned you. So I challenge you to a Duel and win. I than eat up your remains and leave the bones. I than throw the bones over the side of a boat bit by bit in every ocean spread out.
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Ah but as soon as you ate me, I burst into flames. You just burnt from the inside. :D
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A Broccoli necromancer that I had eaten a while ago put all my body bits together again. so when he died I planted him and I stated a Broccoli Empire.
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The Broccoli Empire is then riven by discord and suffers greatly. 20 generations down the line, a Broccoli Emperor takes the throne and is to weak to retain the Empire. The size of the Empire is reduced to teh size of a veggie garden.
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If it's reduced to teh size of a veggie garden, then maybe we could change the topic :P
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Failed at building my own empire I build another Death Star and travel to mars and be a hermit in a Sci-Fi red hobbit hill.
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wtf :P
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IDK. My brain got all mixed up.
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I think we should do a new game of this.
What would happen if I slept well tonight? :P
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If you slept well tonight, you would have had a wonderul day! ;)
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If Jubal had a wondeful day, Cthulhu would try to ruin it.
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I'm pretty sure we had Cthulhu for dinner last night.
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We got sick and spewed it down the toilet.
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If you got sick and spewed Cthulhu down the toilet, you'd have an evil demigod in your plumbing.
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If you had an evil demigod in your plumbing, your pipes would get blocked.
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If your pipes were blocked, your toilets would back up.
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If the toilets backed up then sewerage would rule the Earth! A la the Brocolli Empire. :D
I live to ruin this game. :P
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The Brocolli Empire makes war with you. By cloging up you toilet too.
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And if your toilet was clogged, it would back up. :P
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If it will back up, you'll need Chuck [...] Taylor to fix it.
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Not if the Brocolli Empire's assassins kill him.
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If the Brocolli empire kill you, our forum will loose its self-apointed official necro-poster!
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The Brocolli empire is dead. RISE HELL MUFFINS!!!
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If hell muffins rose, then you would need to take them out of the oven before they overcook.
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The Hell Muffins burn!! IN MUFFIN HELL!!! HWAHAHA!!
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If left the Hell Muffins to burn in the oven they would be angry with Khan
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Khan will try to correct the fault in the past by going back in time using a toaster.
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If Khan tried to go back in time using a toaster it would not work
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But if feet tried to go back in time with a toilet it would work.
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But I wouldn't try to go back in time with a toilet so I wouldn't know
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If feet doesn't try to go back in time, time travel won't be invented.
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If time travel is not invented then there is no possibility of screwing with the space-time continuum... :(
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If there is no possibility of screwing with the space-time continuum than there will be no epic quest to fix it...
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If their's no epic quest Khan will get bored
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If I get bored I'll post spam more often. (Have you noticed how much quicker posts go up here than other forums? It's because forum games don't count as spam.)
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Something I give thanks to all the Gods for every day. :P Your Gods, my Gods, everybody's Gods. :D
I Khan spams more often, Portugal will explode.
YEAH BABY! I'M BACK! :D
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If Portugal explodes than the surrounding countries will catch fire and spread until all of the continents from Africa to Europe and Asia have been burnt up.
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If that happens there's no Bali
(How do you insert images?)
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Find the URL of the image (right click -> properties), then put an img tag around the url in your post.
If the image is on your PC you need to upload it to imageshack or suchlike.
If there was no Bali, all the insects of Bali would be homeless.
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(Thanks)
If the insects of Bali were homeless, they'll live with Jubal
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If they'll live with Jubal, he would need a bigger place! :P
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if Jubal needs a bigger place, he'll buy an inflatable house
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If he'll buy an inflatable house, he'll need a pump to inflate it... :D cool house he'll have... ;D
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If he'd need a pump to inflate it, Jubal will look for one.
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If I was looking for a pump, I'd go to my shed.
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If he would go to his shed, he'll find a homeless guy.
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If he will find a homeless guy, he will need to find him an inflatable home... (Yes Jubal always helps homeless people, that's why the UK is so funky-ing good and God saves their Queen) ;D
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If Jubal needs to find him an inflatable house he will ask Dimos to steal a Bouncy Castle.
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If Dimos steals a bouncy castle Dimos will break the law.
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If Dimos breaks the law he will become a fugitive.
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If Dimos becomes a fugitive, he'll be wanted.
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If I'll be wanted, surrender to the police (Her majesty's Imperial Police).
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If he'd surrendered, he'll be chucked into a prison
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If I'll be chucked into a prison, I'll try to escape! :D ( Now lets kick some ass ;D ;D ;D)
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Your ass kicking returns you to prison. :P
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Your return makes Jubal feel guilty
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Because I feel guilty, I fail my degree and feet feels guilty. :P
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Because Feet feels guilty, he asks for my release, for I am the reason he feels guilty about Jubal... ;)
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Dimos will soon feel guilty about calling feet a "he" when in fact feet is a "she". ;)
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Because Dimos is guilty from calling me a 'he', I will convince him to commit suicide as a way of revenge.
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This would make feet feel guilty. :(
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And Dimos be eliminated, thus if you please, change the last ''comandment'' :o
''She'' Feet
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Feet is she indeed.
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I am indeed
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Upon discovering this, feet disappears in a puff of smoke, thereby validating rule #30.
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However, I choose to be a rebel and reappear.
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I have a 3 level "Iron fist" general in the region were you spawned,plus he has a army full of elite Feudal Knights.And he is also a 2 level engineer,and thus he caries 4 catapults with him.
Good luck beating that with your peasant army.
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But my peasant army has hell muffins and broccoli. WAR!
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This has got... a little less philosophical, somehow. :P
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If it has got little less philosophical, then Jubal will start to cry! ;)
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If Jubal starts to cry,I will make him cry even more by posting up historical information about the glory of Portugal.
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If you post up information about the history of Portugal, I will stop crying with sadness and start crying with joy. Portugal is portugaling awesome. And more to the point, I'm a historian. :P
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If that is true,Joao II will be very happy,and that will add + 3 to my relations with Portugal,and greatly piss off Shaka.
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If Joao II will be very happy,and he will add + 3 to Skull's relations with Portugal (and greatly piss off Shaka), then Skull will be awarded a medal of Imperial Grace.
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If I get the medal of Imperial Grace,I will use it to sing a peace treaty with Alexander the Great,and declare war on Tokugawa.
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If you sign the peace treaty with Alexander the Great, and declare was on Tokuwaga, your forces will meet defeat! :-[
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And if your forces meet defeat, they will become best of friends and go out with each other and eventually will doth be in a relationship together and get engaged and married and divorced... you were defeated be love... that's why the divorce happened... you had an affair with love, you cheated on defeat.
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That will create a black hole because of it's confusing nature.
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If that happens than Defeat would than be sucked into the Black Hole making Earth a peaceful place.
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If earth will be made a peaceful place, then chaos will emerge.
(Opposites truly cover each other in an eternal attempt to take over, even if they truly know that none can rule over the other; thus being in perfect harmony!)
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If chaos emerges than the Muffin daemons from the depths of muffin hell will return!
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If the Muffin Daemons return,then I will eat them!
OMNOMNOM
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If you eat them than they'll your belly and eat their way out!
OMNOMNOM
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If they eat their way out, they will melt like some freaky ice-cream!
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If they melt than all the sugar will spread through Skulls blood, giving him diabetes.
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If he has diabetes then he'll have to watch his diet.
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If he'll have to watch his died, he will eat only roasted Khans.
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If I only ate roasted Khans,I would be very fat. :(
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If you were very fat, you would find tightrope walking harder.
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If it was harder, then he might fall when attempting to walk on a tightrope.
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If he might fall when attempting to walk on a tightrope, he'll never try to do tightrope walking at all...
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If he never tries to do tightrope walking at all, he'll never fall off a tightrope.
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So not realising his tightrope skills have been compromised, he walks the tightrope. And falls.
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If he falls he will probably hurt himself in some manner
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If he hurts himself in some manner, he may be able to get compensation.
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If he gets compensation, he might take up a hobby.. say.. trampolining?
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If he takes up trampolining he might fall again...
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If he falls again he might get bruised head..
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If he gets a bruised head he may feel PAIN.
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If he feels pain he might become aware of the harsh realities of life.
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If he became aware of the harsh realities of life he might become upset.
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If he becomes upset he might cry :(
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If he cries his crying might be heard all around the world.
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If his crying was heard all around the world it would be so loud that nearby objects would be destroyed by the sonic energy.
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The destroyed objects might then develop into a vortex.
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The vortex might be strong enough to pull more things into its swirling mass...
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He might be pulled into the vortex cause by his crying.
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He might start to cry more as he realises that being pulled into a vortex he caused himself represents yet another harsh reality of life.
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He might create a lake full oh his lacrimae
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He might have to swim along in the floating lake of his own sorrow.
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He could finally reach the shore and be delighted with his achievement.
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If he will be delighted with his achivement, he will firmly believe in being a god-like creature...
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Of vortexes.
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If I,in any way,become a god-like creature,I would make everyone on the world visit Exilian,meet Gaius Julius Caesar,and take over the world.
And also,make Comrade General my Master of the Horse.
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But if you do, there will be a rival who will stop you from taking over all the world. His name is Rumpelstiltskin.
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If he indeed rises,I shall fight him!
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If Skull fights, he would need an awesome soundtrack to back him on his way to victory!
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Should the soundtrack play, he might be inclined to start doing ever more heroic deeds.
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That will once again be stopped by Rumpelstiltskin.
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Then I shall whistle the epic soundtrack!
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And that might well cause Rumplestiltskin to vanish in a puff of rather nasty smelly smoke.
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And if that happens than world peace might just be achieved.
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And if that happens,the world economy could recover.
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And if that happens Australia might double the American dollar. ;)
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And if that happens,Australia will become very powerful and fund a creation of giant spider mechs for their armed forces!
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And if that happens than Australia will become the leading county in both economy and military.
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And if that happens,The Khan will take over Australia!
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And if that happens I'll make everyone bow to me. :)
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and if the bound to you, I will rise against you!
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And if that happens I'll be really scared and take over Mars and make that my empire and became friends with the Mars people.
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And if that happens,you will get access to new,awesome weaponry!
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And if that happens than I'll go down to Earth to take my revenge.
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And if you do that,I shall resist you!
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And if that happens, I'll resist your resistance.