Just finally got round to starting reading this - sorry, I've been very preoccupied recently with work. It's interesting :)
I find myself wanting a bit more description than you tend to give: you tend to write action largely with relatively little to visualise the scene by, so a few details of what the characters and rooms look like would help (especially this is true in science fiction settings like this where the look and feel of the place is less what readers will come with an already good idea of). It would also give the reader a bit more time to absorb the large amounts of lore information that are clearly important on the various factions and cultures which I know you've put a lot of thought into. Looking forward to more!
Thank you, sir! and thanks for your advices. Yeah, i have a full information about the Lore. Its near - in these topics
https://exilian.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=6291.0
https://exilian.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=6322.0
My book is going with the full historical information. Also i`m trying to tell more things in my story. Sometimes in the beggining its can sounds like "what is going on?". But after some time, you understanding the full plot "picture".