Messages

1

Stories and AARs / Re: Embers in the Ash

« on: December 31, 2015, 03:11:59 AM »

Yeah, totally get that. I find it helpful to jot down story ideas when I think of them in Evernote. And then when I feel like writing I can just look through the list and pick a project.

2

Stories and AARs / Re: Life Trade - a short story

« on: December 30, 2015, 01:23:46 PM »

Thanks!! I have a new story about the same concept coming soon, which I hope to eventually share with you all. It's called "A LifeTrade Wedding" and is about a groom leaving his bride at the altar but finding a replacement for himself.

3

Computer Game Development - The Indie Alley / Re: We, The Watched - Chapter One - a Twine text adventure

« on: December 30, 2015, 01:21:10 PM »

I like the principle of looking at surveillance from an amnesiac's perspective - it's definitely a major political issue for me, and that's an interesting twist on looking at it.

The game I thought generally worked well, though there were perhaps a few too many places where picking one option just gave you a readout and then presented you with the other option - doing that can make the player feel a bit "railroaded" (which makes sense from the perspective of following a writer's plot, but perhaps less from a game player's perspective). I did enjoy it though, was an interesting playthrough!

Thanks. Yeah -- with this one it's basically impossible to lose. You either get more or less details about the world depending on what you choose. The reason is I want to get people to the end with this one. Also, this is my first Twine so I kept things simple. For my next Twine project I think I'll try to have multiple paths and endings.

4

Stories and AARs / Re: Embers in the Ash

« on: December 29, 2015, 02:48:06 PM »

Definitely hooked me! Also, I like that last paragraph, profanity and all.

If I could make one suggestion, your protagonist is very serious in the beginning but reveals he has humor about the situation later on (the laughing and that last bit I mentioned above). Maybe he could be more amused about his situation from the start? Maybe humor is how he copes with a traumatic situation?

Anyway I liked it, so if you think it's best as is, it's totally fine.

5

Stories and AARs / Life Trade - a short story

« on: December 29, 2015, 02:33:44 PM »

I'm new to the forum and thought I'd share one of my short stories with you all.

This one is called "Life Trade". http://www.adambenderwrites.com/2013/01/06/life-trade-short-story/

It's about an online match-making service that lets someone permanently trade places with someone else! Sort of light sci-fi in the style of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Hope you enjoy.

6

The Welcome Hall - Start Here! / Re: Hello there.

« on: December 29, 2015, 02:19:25 PM »

Thanks, everyone! Seems like a friendly place!

I've cleaned up the links in your signature (they had got a bit mangled), so hopefully people can find their way to your books now. The issues around privacy and surveillance are of considerable interest to me, not least because of the current UK government's attitude to them, so I may well be reading your books.

Thanks for that. I was definitely having trouble with links before. Maybe my BBcode is rusty.

7

Computer Game Development - The Indie Alley / Re: We, The Watched - Chapter One - a Twine text adventure

« on: December 29, 2015, 02:16:05 PM »

Hey, thanks! That's exactly the response I was looking for, haha. When you do check out the book, please let me know what you think!

8

Computer Game Development - The Indie Alley / We, The Watched - Chapter One - a Twine text adventure

« on: December 28, 2015, 11:37:48 PM »

Hi all, @ExilianOfficial on Twitter encouraged me to share my Twine game, so here goes!

This short text adventure is based on my novel We, The Watched. The novel is set in a dystopian nation in which the government keeps a Watched list of its own citizens. Citizens must be careful about what they say because there are surveillance cameras everywhere. Meanwhile, the Church has become as powerful as the State, and people who resist are called Heretics and face execution. The books follow a young man called Seven who wakes with no memory in this surveillance society. His amnesia gives him a blank-slate perspective that helps him see through the propaganda, and he soon gets involved with a group of rebels called The Underground.

The new text adventure follows Chapter One of We, The Watched, in which Seven wakes up in the middle of a forest with no idea of where he is or how he got there.

All right, enough introduction! You can play at http://goo.gl/6sv9rJ

9

The Welcome Hall - Start Here! / Hello there.

« on: December 28, 2015, 11:29:47 PM »

Is it me you're looking for?



Hello! Just joined the community. I'm a journalist and indie author, with two published novels and a third on the way. I'm not an advanced programmer, but I've liked making games since Klik & Play came out. I now do some stuff in Multimedia Fusion 2 and Twine, mostly related to my books. Look forward to chatting with you all.