« previous next »
Pages: [1]

Author Topic: Preface  (Read 2511 times)

ZerWeiEr

  • Posts: 1
  • Karma: 0
    • View Profile
    • Awards
Preface
« on: March 08, 2011, 02:48:01 AM »
Preface


I never knew that protecting someone could be so difficult, or furthermore saving their life. In the back of my mind I knew that I had many reasons to die because of my decision, but that didn
Logged

Doomchild

  • Citizens
    Voting Member
  • Posts: 341
  • Karma: 2
    • View Profile
    • Awards
Preface
« Reply #1 on: March 08, 2011, 05:37:46 PM »
It's really good.I just think you need to make some sections more sharp, if you know what i mean, to increase the tension.
Also
Quote
I smiled at her as the trigger slid back
kind of jarred with me not sure why, maybe just it's me, you would need to get more opions because it isnt bad just doesnt feel right to me.
Logged
Pages: [1]
« previous next »