The Edge of Darkness

[Phoenixguard09]

And here's the story I wrote for the actual QCS, minus a few fancy things I didn't do in my draft and couldn't remember when I got home.

The night had been exceptionally long.  A dark shroud had covered the forest for months, the cloying shadows giving the impression of a disease festering in amongst the woods.  Dew covered the mist-strewn forest floor, an icy reminder of the lack of warmth.  Pools of water were brackish and stagnant as if without the healing touch of the sun, water itself was unable to remain healthy.  Trees showed the signs of the hard times, their boughs devoid of leaves, utterly lifeless.   This severe corruption had run through the entirety of the forest, leaving all living things grey and longing for the golden touch of the sun.

One of these creatures was the wolf.  A large creature adapted to better times, when prey was large and plentiful and there was enough light to run down its victim.  The wolf’s dark grey pelt helped it to blend into the shadows of this new era, however a predator’s pride is a strong force and the beast did not wish to slink around in the darkness.  In the mind of the wolf, there was no thrill greater than running free and wild under the benevolent presence of the sun.  Without its golden rays illuminating the forest, the wolf had been unable to hunt effectively, his carefully timed runs unequal to the sheer speed of its prey and their numerous hiding places.

The wolf’s hunger gnawed at his innards just as the wolf itself had done to his prey.  The pain had escalated in the past week as more and more time had passed without a meal.  The wolf’s crushing bite and indefatigable stamina may have been equal to the task of ending lives, however it required enormous amounts of sustenance to fuel these functions.  The predator’s strength was nearly at an end.  Still, the wolf would not accept defeat, the predator’s pride preventing it from doing so.  He held on to life in the vain hope that, perhaps, the shadows might be pushed back by the silver glint of dawn.

The wolf’s staggering steps belied his purpose as the predator wandered through the forest, questing for life.  The beast needed to feel flesh parting under its fangs, the ripping of flesh and the crushing of bone.  Lost in the reverie, the wolf almost failed to notice the slight lessening of the oppressive gloom.   Astray beam of gold streaked down from the predominantly grey sky, illuminating a nearby clearing.  The light excited the old wolf, bringing back more memories of the hunt.  The taste of blood foremost in the predator’s mind, the wolf made his way into the clearing, eager to finally feed.

The golden blanket of the rising sun had begun to bring heat and light back to a comfort deprived world.  In the clearing, a deer had emerged from the undergrowth to take advantage of the gathering dawn.  As its head bent down to crop the blades of grass from the slowly warming ground, the wolf got into position.  The predator hugged the ground, the charcoal grey shape indistinct as it weaves through the dense woodland.  A sharp crack spit the air as the wolf’s fatigue caused him to make a mistake.  The prey’s head jerked up, wide brown eyes scanning anxiously for danger.  The predator froze, as if the very breath of winter had engulfed it.  He went unnoticed by the deer and as it continued grazing, the wolf broke cover.

The dark grey shape hurtled from the tree line, ivory fangs glinting in the waxing light.  A savage growl ripped free from the wolf’s throat, full of primal fury as yet another skirmish erupted in the war between predator and prey.  The deer looked up, terror welling in those brown eyes as it bleated in fear and turned to run.  It made no difference, as the wolf’s endurance and speed would easily allow the predator to close with its prey.  However, as the deer began to attempt its flight, the golden touch of the sun receded, leaving the forest and its inhabitants shrouded in a dull blanket of death and darkness once more.

I reckon I related it to the stimulus alright. Personally I don't think its as good as me eagle one but still...

EDIT: Holy fudgemonkeys! I won the Writer of the Year with this! Maybe the eagle one wasn't as good after all.

[comrade_general]

Very good! Reminds me a lot of The White Panther by Theodore Waldeck.

[Ladyhawk]

Wow, dude thats awesome!

[Andalus]

Good stuff. What was the stimulus you mention?

[Jubal]

Lovely, beautiful language - and yeah, what was the stimulus?

The other thing, have you considered playing with more unorthodox word order a bit more at times? If you haven't it's worth thinking about, e.g. "and there was light enough to run down its victim." (that wasn't a great example, but it's the kind of thing I mean). That might inject a bit more of a poetic feel into your descriptions, just a thought. 

[Phoenixguard09]

The stimulus was gold. One of the images on the sheet was the sun and something about how it always makes people feel better. So I took it from there.

That's some good advice there Jubal. Trying out things that are out of my comfort zone and what-not. I'll look into it. Thanks mate.

Actually, no. Thanks all of you for reading it.

[Son of the King]

This is really good!

[Silver Wolf]

A story? About me? Oh Mr. Beauregard, I do declare!


Now seriously, it's a great piece...
Congratulations.

[Captain Carthage]

The detail is really good.

Well done on winning, you deserve it.

[Phoenixguard09]

Thanks SotK, NA and SW.

To NightAngel: I don't know if I deserve it exactly. From memory, some of the other entries were pretty good. But yeah. Thanks mate.

[Ladyhawk]

Phoenixguard.......shut up.

^^ hahaha