Hare.
Basically, a virus had somehow piggybacked on the official Messenger download, a piece of adware which basically made my internet run incredibly slowly. Following this I tried to search and destroy files myself, but I got access denied despite being an administrator. So I tried to end the process, with no luck.
Then I gave up and searched on the (now slow) interwebs for a solution. It recommended a certain virus scanner (SpyHunter) for the particular problem, so I tried using it, and discovered that you can only delete viruses using the software, if you pay the best part of 40 quid, so I thought not. I had, by this point managed to disable it from chrome, so my browsing isn't affected, but it's still in the computer, despite additional virus scans by Avira and another recommended malware remover: Scanbot, which would actually... DELETE FILES...FOR FREE! It still wouldn't let me delete because I "wasn't administrator". If anyone else gets this "Incredibar" believe me, it's a nightmare to rid from your hard drive.