Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer

[Jubal]

Ageless and fatherless.

If there is red wine and white wine, why no green wine or black wine?

[Tusky]

Because red and white are the colours of the flag of Denmark, where wine was invented (side note: Big fan of Vinho Verde)

Could a steam train be used to steam vegetables?

[The Seamstress]

The name says it: No. It's only for steaming trains. You'd need a steam vegetable to steam vegetables.

Why are vegetables vegetable-shaped?

[Jubal]

I blame the tautologists.


Why doesn't the sun swap places with alpha centauri sometimes for a change of scene?

[The Seamstress]

Because the sun is way too heliocentric.

Why isn't everything just spherical? So many different forms lead only to confusion!

[Jubal]

We needed to turn a corner.

Why do we yearn to eat the moon?

[The Seamstress]

Because we were made to believe it is made of cheese. (The Goddess of All Cheeses might be responsible, but that's just an unconfirmed theory.)

What did the sheep say to the grass?

[Jubal]

moo.

why do brambles go on rambles?

[The Seamstress]

Because it rhymes.

How long until yellow striped zombie alien wereworms invade Neptune?

[Jubal]

Why would yellow striped zombie alien wereworms invade Neptune? That's purple spotted zombie alien wereworm territory.

Which bird is officially responsible for all the cherry trees?

[Tusky]

Cherry Valentine

In France do they call the small pre-meal appetisers an "amused mouth", instead of amuse bouche? And do they have an "entrance" instead of an entree?

[The Seamstress]

I don't know. This world makes no sense, and so does France.

If Exilian were a person, what would they look like?

[Jubal]

I don't know, but I hope they'd look kind. They might also look like a llama, but that's incidental.

Why isn't fire more like ice?

[The Seamstress]

Because it has signed a contract it can't legally get out of until the collapse of the galaxy.

What or who will cause the collapse of the galaxy?

[Jubal]

Vance Miller, the Kitchen Gangster.

Why am I not allowed to cuddle a badger?