Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer

[The Seamstress]

I don't know. It's a mistake of nature.

Why does tap water always taste more or less the same and doesn't come in different flavours, like apple?

[Jubal]

That would be tapple water, it comes from a different tap(pple).

Why is the field next door being cut for no reason?

[The Seamstress]

The aliens want more crop circles but are too busy to do it themselves.

Why can't I get free food delivered to my door?

[Jubal]

Because your door doesn't need to eat and wouldn't know what to do with the free food. What do doors even consume?

When is the next presidential election on Neptune?