Author Topic: King of the Hill  (Read 97700 times)

Ierne

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1080 on: January 20, 2020, 10:37:46 PM »
I gather a large group of NPCs, which your bards are compelled by some deep inner instinct to attempt to seduce.

I then take the hill using a large flock of speciallyt trained battle Seagulls

My hill

Glaurung

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1081 on: January 20, 2020, 11:17:39 PM »
I lure the seagulls away with strategically placed supplies of fish and chips, sandwiches and doughnuts. I then bring in my own group of pandas, and plant the hill with bamboo to ensure a long-term food supply. The pandas have no military effectiveness, but potential adversaries find themselves unable to attack the cute furry creatures.

Jubal

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1082 on: January 20, 2020, 11:22:17 PM »
I put myself in stasis, wait a few hundred years until the pandas have died out from being too damn useless to be able to breed effectively, and then take over the hill. I have it guarded by the sphinx, because she owes me a favour.
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

Tusky

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1083 on: January 21, 2020, 09:07:09 AM »
I arm myself with a :gollum: and wield his expert riddlecraft at the sphinx, who becomes defeated.

My hill
Check out Tourney: The medieval tournament simulator, a PC game I am working on!
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Jubal

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1084 on: January 25, 2020, 09:24:08 PM »
I get Gollum to go drop himself into a dramatic volcano.

I take the hill with an army of the free peoples of Middle-earth! My hill!
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

Ierne

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1085 on: January 25, 2020, 11:07:33 PM »
The free peoples of Middle Earth are very easily distracted by Dark Lords. I get Vader to pretend to invade several miles away, and sneak up the hill while no one is looking

My hill!

Jubal

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1086 on: January 28, 2020, 10:05:11 PM »
Vader is bad at only pretending to invade. He rolls over your hill, and the rest of the planet, with his dark legions. I offer in exchange for dominion over the hill the only thing known to be able to stop Vader's forces in their tracks, the thing Stormtroopers tell their kids as horror stories, the most terrifying force in the Star Wars universe. Yes, the hill is now garrisoned by Ewoks.

My hill!
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

Tusky

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1087 on: January 29, 2020, 08:03:21 AM »
I bring a young child armed with a nerf gun riding an old asthmatic mule. They are more than a match for your ewoks who nearly instantly rout.

My hill.
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Jubal

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1088 on: January 29, 2020, 10:03:25 AM »
I bribe the mule with carrots and the young child with chocolate.

My hill.
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Tusky

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1089 on: February 05, 2020, 02:01:53 PM »
I bring that helicopter from desert / jungle / urban strike and make many things explode

My hill
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Jubal

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1090 on: February 05, 2020, 02:48:14 PM »
The eagles are coming! The eagles are coming!

My hill!
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Tusky

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1091 on: February 10, 2020, 09:52:55 AM »
Eddie the eagle Edwards is coming! He does sort of ok in a skiing competition down the hill.

Which is now mine.
Check out Tourney: The medieval tournament simulator, a PC game I am working on!
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Jubal

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1092 on: February 10, 2020, 10:53:26 AM »
Uh, I use... a half decent Olympic standard skiier, who beats Eddie the Eagle and claims the hill for me.

My hill!
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

Tusky

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1093 on: February 10, 2020, 10:59:08 AM »
I set fire to the hill, and send in some lava people to garrison it.

My Hill.
Check out Tourney: The medieval tournament simulator, a PC game I am working on!
Links: Devlog thread here on Exilian | Tusky Games Website

Jubal

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Re: King of the Hill
« Reply #1094 on: February 10, 2020, 11:15:35 AM »
I send Greta Thunberg to berate you for the carbon emissions involved in needlessly burning an entire hill, until you slink away in shamr.

My hill.
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...