Spoil a wish

[Jubal]

such doge. very you. forever dogespeak. wow.

You are bombed by the CIA for being so annoying.

I wish I could call in a helicopter when I wanted to.

[Cuddly Khan]

You do, and it lands on you a squishes you.

I wish I could see everything all over the world even as it's happening.

[Othko97]

You go insane from the amount of information your brain has to process.

I wish I wasn't ill at the moment.

[Jubal]

You are not ill at the moment. This is because you are dead.

I wish I was less of a midget.

[Cuddly Khan]

The genie miss hears you and makes you even shorter.

I wish for skittles.

[Jubal]

You are condemned to play bowling with old people forever (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skittles_(sport))

I wish for more awakeness.

(Also, can we avoid doing "the genie mishears you" as it's a massive cop-out - the aim is to find a destructive flaw with the wish as asked).

[Cuddly Khan]

Will awkward silence do?

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. *Owls*

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I wish for dots!

[Jubal]

Your life is invaded by an endless army of elderly ladies called Dorothy "but you can call us Dot, dearie". They make you so much tea and cake you die of eating disorders.

I wish for a single, edible, just about ripe, regularly sized plum.

[Cuddly Khan]

It spontaneously combusts in your face just before you can take a bite, setting you hair on fire and scorching your face.

I wish for a tree house!

[Jubal]

You get a treehouse, but the tree has no lower branches so you can't reach it.


I wish I could teleport.

[Tom]

You can teleport but it takes the same amount of time to teleport somewhere as it would to walk there. Also, you lose a piece of yourself after each teleportation because it's a bit glitchy. Sorry about that.


I wish I could go back in time.

[comrade_general]

You go back to before the Earth had formed and solidify in empty space.

I wish for one million dollars!

[Jubal]

You get one million Zimbabawean dollars, which are no longer legal tender.

I wish for an ent.

[comrade_general]

It accidentally steps on you. BARUMM?

I wish for a Valyrian steel sword.

[Jubal]

You get a Valyrian steel sword. Unfortunately, rather than being made of Valyrian steel, this was simply made with regular steel in Valyria. As such it is now a rusted mess and wholly useless.

I wish for nicer curtains.