Spoil a wish

[Cuddly Khan]

You get them, and they do look really nice, but they are see through so they don't keep any sun out and anyone who wants to can look in.

I wish for water.

[Jubal]

You get unlimited seawater, which is sufficiently salty that drinking it is if anything likely to make you more thirsty.

I wish my washing up was done.

[Cuddly Khan]

They are magically done, but then they all spontaneously shatter.

I wish for updates.

[Jubal]

You get updated on all the news in the life of Cyril Herbert Dunnsley, a seventy-one year old living in a flat in Birmingham.

He is not a very interesting man.

You get continually updated on his life and it drives you mad.

I wish someone else could get an extra wish.

[Cuddly Khan]

Wishes go back through time as well, your extra wish goes to Hitler.

I wish for normality.

[Jubal]

It turns out that abnormality is in fact normal.

I wish for Tolkien to be able to finish some of his unfinished works.

[Cuddly Khan]

He does but at the same time starts a zombie apocalypse.

I wish for avatars.

[Jubal]

There is nothing but forum avatars. No text, no other information, just avatars. As the space in your brain once taken up by "how to breathe", "how to eat", and "how to walk" is now taken up by avatars, this state of affairs is fairly brief before everyone involved dies.

I wish I was less sleepy.

[Cuddly Khan]

You fall asleep.

I wish for a soul.

[Gmd]

You get a evil soul. Congrats!

I wish for some cheeeeeeeeese.

[Jubal]

You get cheese. It's poisoned.

I wish I didn't have a headache.

[Cuddly Khan]

You're head gets chopped off. Now you can't feel anything. All better.

I wish for a skittle.

[Jubal]

You get some skittle and are picked up by cops and thrown in jail.

I wish I could actually interview my dissertation subjects. Would be so useful.

[Othko97]

You manage it, but are killed after insulting an axe-wielding monk.

I wish I was better at mathematics

[Jubal]

You get so good at maths that reality makes no sense.

I wish I was better at managing stress.