Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer

Started by Cuddly Khan, February 17, 2011, 06:59:44 AM

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The Seamstress

They mess up all the time and hide in inaccessible places so people can't throw eggs at them. The cowards.

Who really was the first terrestrial being in space?

Jubal

Maui.


When I bleed, why do I not bleed tea? Am I not sufficiently British?
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

The Seamstress

You've spent some time in Austria so you've absorbed Austrianity. Which makes you bleed blood. We're all secretly vampire bats here, like it or not.


What is the meaning of life?

Jubal

It's an adventure game I made!



Why aren't there more games with ankylosaurs in?
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

The Seamstress

Because you haven't made them yet!


Which criteria does an occurrence have to meet to be considered a strange occurence?

Jubal

Telling you would normalise the strangeness, therefore I cannoblrebble flobblebit turpingchord.



Why hasn't Professor McBlusterFluff's Highly Trained Titmouse solved all the... this *waves tiredly at the window*?
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

The Seamstress

It just can't be bothered, it's tired like all of us. Who could blame it, really.

How can I acquire magic powers?

Jubal

For only $9.99 from Amazon dot com. Efficacy not guaranteed.

Should I change the available smileys?
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

The Seamstress

Maybe they already changed you. *maniacal laughter echoes through the darkness*


Why is two plus two four and not twenty-two?

Jubal

The owls decreed it so.


Why is polenta not quicker to cook?
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

The Seamstress

Out of spite. Polenta hates the universe and everything in it.

(I think there's instant polenta to buy though? It's pre-cooked or something.)


Why am I a boring human and not a princess, mermaid, or adventurer? All those childhood fairytales were just making empty promises.

Jubal

Because princesses have a bad tendency to fall asleep for a thousand years in the presence of needles, sewing underwater is hard, and adventurers struggle to fit sewing machines into their backpacks: so to be you, which is the best thing for you to be, you can't always be the other things :) (Though never say never)

Why is there beeswax but not waspwax or antwax?
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

The Seamstress

Because bees are superior beeings, so they and only they can produce wax, the magical golden ingredient in magical golden candles and other magical things. They will not share their wisdom, as it is the ancient knowledge of their beeople.

What happened to Beelinda II., Queen Bee of Beezantine, in 1200?

Jubal

She died. Bees don't live very long.


Why do flowers dislike the planet Saturn?
The duke, the wanderer, the philosopher, the mariner, the warrior, the strategist, the storyteller, the wizard, the wayfarer...

The Seamstress

Too far away from the sun. Too much gas.

How do I get better at singing without having to sell my soul to a demon?